First things first, congratulations to the Seattle Sounders for scaling the Mariana Trench that was their first half of season and the disposing of Dallas in the first leg of their playoff matchup. Second things second, A+ headline to the MLS: J-Mo & Sounders make it rain on Dallas. Early tallies are in and 12 new bands were formed in the Pacific Northwest region with a variation of “J-Mo & The Sounders”.

CenturyLink field is officially alive with the sound of music aka volleying chants from endline to endline which is truly a magnificent thing to hear. The fans do that chant because they love the way it sounds, but also partly because the theory that sound waves can actually generate a sonic thrust for any object they come in contact with that is both wide and unbalanced enough is neither proven nor dis-proven. If you’re a fan of Seattle you get in those stands and at least give this chant a try on the off chance it gives J-Mo a couple more MPHs.

This sonic thrust will especially come in handy at this point in the season. J-Mo Smooth has played a lot this season. I’m about to spout some Microsoft Excel generated values at you now (Danny look away) because I love data:

  • J-Mo Smooth played in 34 games averaging 84 mins per game
  • J-Mo Smooth played 90 minutes in 22 games
  • J-Mo Smooth played 80+ minutes in 28 games
  • J-Mo Smooth has an on field drag coefficient of .91 – had to custom write this function, if you’d like a copy message me

Up 3-0 and an enormous Conference final looming do you go ahead and rest J-Mo Smooth for the upcoming second leg in Dallas? Some would say you don’t get in the way of a boulder when it’s headed down-mountain. I tend to agree he should play, if you take the sails off the Santa Maria as soon as it sees land does Columbus end up exploring the Americas? No, he’d have a portion of a cruise ship docking section of a marina named after him in the Bahamas.